I have a seasonal joke for you; are you ready? Ahem, here goes: How do ghosts search the Web? … They use ghoul-gle. Ba Dum Tss! 🥁 Lucky for you, you don’t even need Google to cash in on some great seasonal buys because I’ve got Halloween locked up tight thanks to these Amazon goodies … and there’s not a single plastic mask circa Haloween 1984 (you know, the ones you couldn’t breathe in?) or candy apple that’ll pull all your teeth out in sight.
What I do have, though, is a collection of the spookiest creatures (zombies and witches, anyone?), clever yard decor, and even selections from The Teal Pumpkin Project, which helps trick-or-treaters with food allergies stay safe. If that’s not enough, you’ll find spiders, gear for the spookiest breakfast of the year, and even skeleton bats (and yes, they’re just as creepy as they sound). Are you spooky season ready? If you’ve got it, haunt it!
Turn Into A Pumpkin
Fall brings all things pumpkin: Pumpkin spice, pumpkin pie, and even porch pumpkins. If you’re going to decorate your space with pumpkins, you need these light-up pumpkin props that come dressed for the season with straw hats, witch hats, and plenty of Halloween colors in black, purple, and orange. Pro tip: These are so much easier than carving your own but nobody has to know.
As The Crow Flies
Quoth the crow, “What’s the big deal about ravens anyway?” Edgar Allan Poe was a big fan of ravens but these black crows are equally as creepy and come in a set of six which, appropriately, is called a “murder” (and not a “flock,” thank you, Google). Plop these life-like crows in a tree, on your kitchen table or anywhere you need a little burst of spooky.
Light Up The Night
Lights aren’t just for Christmas and with these orange string lights, you can get into the spirit of the season way before your neighbors. This set of fairy string lights extends to 33 feet in length and can be used indoors or out to add just the right “something” to your Halloween decor. Once Halloween is over, these can extend into your fall and Thanksgiving decor.
Bored Out Of Your Skull
Would it be awkward to have this six-and-a-half-inch skull out as decor year-round? Because I’m really thinking about it. Realistic-looking and life-sized, this skull has a movable jaw you can display opened or closed and has a wide variety of uses from Halloween decor to proper usage to art projects. Use it indoors or out and you’ll have the creepiest house on the block.
Like The Zombies Do
Planning for a zombie outbreak? If you’re grabbing the zombie in slot No. 1, she’s going to need a boyfriend. This zombie groundbreaker is the perfect male addition to your yard full of the undead. You’ll get a zombie head and two arms with sleeves but no legs (they’re probably in the next county over). The pair is certain to be a bit in your neighborhood.
Hey, Pumpkin
I haven’t carved a pumpkin since I was a kid and there are two good reasons: First, it’s hard. Second, it’s messy. This pumpkin carving set eliminates some of the challenges of getting your jack-o’-lantern ready for the season with 11 double-sided tools so that you can carve, cut, and sculpt to your little Halloween heart’s content. It’s a great investment for the season for less than $7.
Spook Your Neighbors with this Creepy… Body
Of all the Halloween options on the list, this is the one that stopped me in my tracks. Maybe it’s because it’s so realistic or maybe it’s because I spend most of my weekend watching true crime shows on TV. This spooky, covered dead body measures a totally realistic five feet in length, showing only the hair at one end and feet at the other. If you’re going for totally creepy inside or out, this is the one.
Join The Zombie Apocalypse
If you’re one of those people who stuck around for all 1,472 seasons of “The Walking Dead,” you deserve this zombie groundbreaker that’s designed to look like it’s coming right out of your yard. This purchase includes a life-sized zombie head and two zombie arms, all made from weatherproof plastic and fabric. There’s no Rick, Carol, or Daryl here but it’s clever nonetheless.
Monster Mash
Do you have little ones who are constantly trying to play with your Halloween decor? (There’s nothing weirder than a kid carrying a zombie head through the house, trust me on this.) This tube of mini monsters includes 100 pieces — everything from spiders and tombstones to Draculas and Frankensteins. Set up a Halloween battle for the ages or get creative and toss them in goodie bags at the school.
Witch, Please
Make your home the creepiest on the block with Wanda The Witch, a realistic, six-foot-tall witch adorned in a creepy black dress and hat with flashing LED eyes. Use this indoors by a mantel or seated at your breakfast nook (pancakes will never be the same) or position it as a spooky greeter at your front door. One reviewer summed it up: “Super creepy! But cool!”
Itsy-Bitsy Spider
There are spiders you stomp on and spiders you run from … and spiders that make you want to burn down your entire house, and this four-foot version with red LED eyes is definitely in the latter category. Large and disgustingly realistic, this spider has black, hairy fur and adjustable long legs (and don’t forget the light-up eyes). Itsy-bitsy, it is not.
Oh, Rats!
These realistic hairy rats skeeve me out so much that I’m typing in double speed to get past them. Packaged in a set of three (because if you have one rat, you have more than one, amirite?), these mini rats would be adorable (O.K., probably not adorable) in a bowl of candy for trick-or-treaters or a perfect choice for scaring the pants off your co-workers (and that’s totally worth $14).
The Longest Scariest Yard
Looking for family-friend Halloween decor that won’t scare the pants off of your kids and the neighbor’s kids? This six-piece set of yard decorations includes four pumpkins and a completely un-creepy skeleton and ghost. The best part of these is the blank back side to give you plenty of room to write your own seasonal messages like, “Please don’t dump all my candy in your trick-or-treat bag.”
Spin A Web
If one spider wasn’t enough for you, I’ve thrown in an extra. This one is an alarming two feet in size with purple LED lights throughout to lend an extra dose of spookiness. One reviewer was especially pleased: “This spider is great. The lights are super bright and they worked well for our Halloween display. I used it outdoors, it held up well with the weather underneath our awning.”
Clowning Around
Everyone knows that clowns are creepy. They’ve been creepy and they’ll continue to be creepy, no matter how many more versions of “It” they come out with. This clown costume set includes the wig, now, shoes, bow, and tie so you have a near-complete Halloween costume in a box for less than $15. One size fits most with this set; eat your heart out, Ronald McDonald.
Flat As A Pancake
Some kids aren’t old enough to appreciate the creepy aspects of Halloween but that doesn’t mean you can’t celebrate by adding a dose of spookiness to breakfast with this Halloween-themed mini waffle maker. Enjoy seven different designs ranging from pumpkins to ghosts to spiders, and then pancakes or waffles slathered in blood, er, syrup. Everyone will love a little bit of the season on their plate.
Right Off The Bat
Which one is scarier: Bats or skeleton bats? Personally, I think they’re both pretty creepy but these skeletonized guys are particularly gnarly. This set of two includes 12-in. bats with hangable feet and movable jaws that are weather-resistant for outdoor decorating. Hang them from trees in your front yard or from your banister to sufficiently creep out anyone who dares set foot on your property.
Time Out For Teal
Food allergies are all trick and no treat for the families who have to deal with them. Show your support by flying this garden flag that indicates you back the Teal Pumpkin Project by providing Halloween treats that are allergen-free. Vibrant and vivid, this flag has a one-sided design and is specially made to withstand the elements while being flown outdoors.
The Pumpkin Project
While you’re flying your flag in support of the Teal Pumpkin Project, you can also dress up your space with these teal pumpkin string lights you can wrap around columns, banisters, and more. This set extends beyond three yards in length and has both eight light modes and a six-hour timer. These battery-operated lights show trick-or-treaters you offer allergy-friendly treats.
Glow In The Dark
Glow sticks have been a rite of passage at Halloween for as long as I can remember. We used to snap these and run around the neighborhood with them even when I was a kid. This set includes 12 glow sticks in a myriad of colors and lanyards for wearing around the neck. It’s also a great alternative trick for the candy goblins.
Art Attack
Speaking of my childhood, these fuse bead kits are giving me all the feels — and the Halloween feels as well! This fuse bead kit features 3,000 pieces so you can create Frankenstein, Dracula, witches, black cats, mummies, and more. You’ll also get eight keychains, four pegboards, tweezers, ironing paper, and a carrying case so you can take your arts and crafts on the road.
Spill The Tea
Let’s face it: Pumpkin spice lattes get all the shine but there are a variety of fall-themed drinks out there that are worthy of some attention … like this Halloween tea gift set that includes flavors like pumpkin, turmeric, and apple cinnamon. You’ll get 100 servings in this set so it’s great for personal use, parties, or spooky get-togethers when spirits are in the air but not on the menu.
Cat Burglar
Squishmallows have been enjoying a moment for a while now — long enough, in fact, to have seasonal varieties like this adorable black cat. This comes in a generous 10-inch size, adorned with a cute witch hat and its own Halloween trick-or-treat bucket. Squishmallows are soft and huggable and this one is sure to be “hard to find” as we get closer to the season.
A Bag Of Bones
Halloween decorating wouldn’t be complete without a skeleton and in this case, two skeletons, one is adult and one child-sized. Pair them together or separate them for added impact; each can be adjusted with a movable head, jaw, and limbs. These are constructed from weather-resistant plastic so they’ll work outdoors as well as in. You can grab this detailed set for less than $80.